"A Festivus for the Rest of Us!"

KLA WINS A LOT OF MONEY IN RELIGIOUS DISCRIMINATION CASE!
In a case of first impression in the State of New York, the creative attorneys at KLA obtained a really big verdict for a man who claimed that his employer, "Kruger Industrial Smoothing", discriminated against him for celebrating the holiday of "Festivus". When the plaintiff brought an aluminum pole to work, his boss, Mr. "Kruger", didn't notice. When he aired his grievances over the company PA system, Mr. "Kruger" simply said: "Whatever." But when the plaintiff defeated him in the 'Feats of Strength", Mr. "Kruger" terminated his employment. Since the plaintiff never held a job for more than one year at a time, the jury awarded nothing for future lost earnings. But while the employer presented evidence that the plaintiff was a mental patient whose condition had been studied at the university level long before he came to "Kruger", the jury took pity and awarded beaucoup bucks for mental pain and suffering. In the spirit of the holiday of Festivus, KLA will donate its share of the settlement to "The Human Fund"", if it proves itself worthy.